Welcome To Turn Up Your Light

Joya 0:00

Deep down, you have a sense that you are far greater than what you are. That sense is your own light, your own life force energy urging you to grow, to expand, and to become more alive with the truth that lights you up. I'm Joya. I'm a sound medicine woman, and I believe that your life is the way. Not a life you're building toward, not a someday version of yourself that you hope to get to, but this life right here, right now, in the messy middle, exactly as it is. In every episode, I will give you the real tools to narrow the gap between what you know and what you're being through ancient wisdom, drum medicine, conscious voice, and the living transmission of a path I didn't choose. It chose me. This is Turn Up Your Light. Let's begin. Hello, beautiful lights and souls. This week I want to talk about what lights you up, your inner light, and what it means to turn up your light by igniting the sacred heart. First, I want to talk about in this what lights you up, that there are qualities of aliveness that the creator gave you, bestowed upon you, that belong to the creator. So if the creator is all that is, if creator is wholeness, which it is, then from that wholeness it gave you wholeness, the wholeness of your being. And in that you have these inherent gifts and abilities and possibilities and potentials that you can fulfill as the creator in this lifetime. These beautiful gifts of aliveness also have polar frequencies because we live in a planet of duality, positive and negative, light and dark, good and evil, male and female. And the male and the female is the first creation of the duality of the wholeness. Because the creator is one, and from the one, the creator made the two to experience each other and to experience each polarity, and we choose based on what lights us up. So the more that we stay in alignment with our gifts, with our potentials, with our possibilities, with our true light, we are fueling the consciousness of the cosmos. And I want to share a little reading from my favorite wisdom teacher, Cynthia Bourgeois, from her book, The Wisdom Way of Knowing. And in this book, she has a chapter called Transformation, the Human Alchemy. And she says that sacred tradition has always said that human beings are a mixed realm. We stand midway between the purely material and the purely energetic, with a full range of versatility in both. The basic animal instincts are programmed right into us, the law of the jungle, the survival of the fittest. But so are the instincts of the highest degree of lucidity and clarity. Our true angelic destiny. If we think of it as something that's off limits to us or that's separate from us, or it's not possible, we're setting ourselves up to make it a more difficult journey. But it is our true destiny when we're living in the truth of what lights us up. So let's talk about. Your inspiration is moving you. You're being breathed with, right? And so that feeling, you also reach it in states of meditation where you reach that edge of not thinking and you're just present. So that's this intermingling space. And then what really blows me away is this. Let me begin to picture this secret through a familiar image, a candle. In its outer sensible form, a candle is an object consisting of tallow and wick. But the real secret of the candle reveals itself only when the match is struck and the candle begins to burn. It gives of the material of its outer form in order to release the heat and fragrance within. Only then do we see what a candle really is. Its outer life is tallow and wick. Its inner life is flame. We are talking here about a transformation, of course, a kind of sacred alchemy. And it's precisely this alchemy that defines our essential human task. The secret of our identity does not lie in the outer form or in how successful we manipulate the outer form of the sensible world. Rather, it lies in how we are able to set them and ourselves aflame to reveal the inner quality of their aliveness. The names of God lie coiled within the physical forms of things. Our particular and uniquely human task is to spring the trap and set them free. They cannot manifest apart from the sensible realm. That's what the sensible world is here for. It's to create in, but neither will they manifest automatically within it unless there's a further act of conscious transformation. That's our job. Working within the raw materials of the physical world, we are to give birthing and body to the names of God so that the invisible becomes visible. We are midwives of the spirit. How beautiful is that! Giving birth to the names of God, midwifing the spirit through us, the spirit of our soul, the spirit of the creator. We can just call these higher states of being. You know, the forces, I always say the force of gravity doesn't need you to believe in it in order for it to be real. And I think that the field is the same way, this conscious field that is the creator, that is the creative that we live in, doesn't need for us to believe in it for it to be real. When you start feeling it in yourself and you start igniting your inner flame and your inner light, the field responds back. And the transformation piece is what I'm gonna get into next. And this is about awakening the flame within the high heart, because that's what's doing the seeing in the higher frequencies and wider perceptions of being and how we awaken the high heart. And I'm gonna share some conversations uh between myself and Amanda and Nancy when we were in Santa Fe last week. And I'm just gonna share some snippets of the conversations we were having around the high heart, because this is the inner alchemy, the sacred alchemy is awakening the high heart, and that flame that gets ignited within you begins to show who you are as the names, and I'm putting this in quotations: names of the creator, names of God. Because the creator can't be named, it's ineffable, it's it's the ineffable oneness, and it can't have a name, and so it can have many, many, many names, and its name is your name, and its name is the qualities that are in within you that you bring out into the world and into the field. And we do this through learning through duality. And so when we go through these hard lessons of life, and when we stay conscious and we stay presence present in them, that's when they begin to alchemize into something else. I don't know how it works. I'm not even going to pretend to know how it works, other than it's the force of the creator. It's the force, it's the active force of the creator that exists on planet Earth that makes good thing, goodness out of all things in time. It is the force that makes people say everything happens for a reason. I always say everything does not happen for a reason, but reason gets made out of everything that happens. And that force is that reason. Some people call it the Holy Spirit, it's the rua force. In Aramaic, it's the Hruka de Kutcha. And it and in quantum physics, it's simply the field. It's all the same thing, though. These are what I'm talking about, all the names that we give something to try to explain what it is. But we can see this force at work in our lives when we're going through what we're going through. When we hit those hard times, when we get through those polarities, the hills, the peaks, and the valleys, right, of life. It's not all one steady, straight path. Or at least mine hasn't been. And I'm going to assume yours hasn't been either. But it's the ups and the downs and the highs and the lows and the wins and the losses and the love and the death and the grief, the divorces, the illnesses, the children moving away, the loss of a career that we've had for a very long time. Anything that radically shakes our identity is what really rattles the cage of our life and forces us to look around and be present with our own grief. And when you open up yourself to be available to this transformation of this alchemy to happen inside of you, it's like you're a cauldron inside of yourself. And the more you stay present with what is, this force does this alchemical work inside of you. And you will hear a lot of people often say, even though it was hard at the time, my sickness was the best thing that ever happened to me. My divorce was the best thing that ever happened to me. I used to say that my childhood trauma was the best thing that ever happened to me because it made me so compassionate and strong and resilient and curious about people. But I would never in a million years say that my son's death is the best thing that ever happened to me. Never would those words come out of my mouth or even cross my mind as a thought. But I will say the gifts that I'm receiving from it are utterly humbling. They're beautiful, they're powerful, they're big. But the price that it costs to receive them keeps me in complete humility of those things. And so I would say let that let that attitude, that attitude, that energy carry you through any kind of alchemy that you're going through. That gratitude that's for the gifts that you receive, the wisdom that you receive, the hard-earned wisdom. And that we want to start choosing to really be one of the names of the creator in the best way we know how. And that's in honoring that light within us that begins to really light the things that are in conflict that we are doing, that we know not to do. And if, you know, and I had this thought too today that if it's if we're all one and I the divine is within you, the divine is within me, the divine is within each other, that we uh have an angelic destiny, that we are aspects of the creator. When I do harm to somebody else, I am harming me. When I do harm to me, I am harming someone else. And when and worse than that, when I do harm to someone else, I am harming them, I am harming me, and I am harming the creator. These are truly offenses against the creator, the divine, God, the source intelligence of all it is. And when we begin to really feel the feeling of remorse with that, it's not a guilt, it's not a judgment. It's a remorseful feeling because it's also pure love. It's not judging. And the fact that everything always works out for the highest, I think is proof that it doesn't judge. So I'm gonna drop in some conversation now between Amanda, Nancy, and I about what it means, and what it took, rather, to step into that high heart energy that we all had to go through some pretty intense things to arrive at that place. And so I'm gonna share each of our stories in the hopes that it resonates with you and you realize that your life is your path. Your life is your path, and whatever's before you is what's presenting itself as your level of growth and as your level of love and as your level of acceptance and forgiveness in your own life. It's always right here, right now. I hope you enjoy these conversations. And that when my heart broke, I felt like A, I was so glad I had stopped drinking like nine months before for good. And I chose to like just really go into the feelings and stay so present. And it broke my heart so open. That part of me that wouldn't open opened. And then it and then what happened the way I described it was it felt like that my heart that was always so outward, loving everybody else, but not myself, like this part of it like turned inward, and I felt it was like a a folding in. It was like a folding in. You know what I'm talking about?

Amanda 16:23

It's almost like a I almost saw like a tear of a heartbreak that tore your heart open so that it could fold in. Yes, yeah. Did you feel it energetically turning?

Joya 16:34

Yes. And I described it. I said it feels like my heart went like I'm doing like the you know, like your church and the steeple kind of thing, but turning my hands like I've had the experience, Joya, energetically.

Amanda 16:46

Yeah, it is. Is it the sacred heart that opened? It opened, yeah. Yes, and then you can hold the flame to a greater degree in the heart space. Just like that picture of Yeshua or Mary Magdalene when their heart is on fire. Yeah, that's it.

Joya 17:02

You guys know exactly what this is.

Amanda 17:03

Yes, it does, it feels interesting when it's happening, but it it's a whole other level of ability to hold that higher frequency in your body's lane.

Nancy 17:16

Yes, and that's why when you're living from the higher heart, we're not living from the heart chakra, which expresses the love and the giving of love and receiving of love, and processing those emotions too, is the heart. But the sacred heart in the finest, the higher, yes, yeah, the higher heart chakra is the soul dwelling. It is the eternal space of your light. And this is where your soul history is. It's really raw. Yeah, and this is where you live your truth. It's very sensitive, it's very vulnerable. And so now in order for us very sensitive, in order for us to live from this, there is a required spiritual maturation of the divine neutrality and witnessing childhood trauma and healing from trauma and all of that stuff, and how intense that's been in my life.

Joya 18:29

But man, I didn't realize that all that trauma. I've been like, I'm I'm okay now, I'm like, I'm good, but my high heart wasn't open.

Amanda 18:37

That's right. But I and I remember you saying it was awakening through grief. It was awakening through grief. It was a whole other level, mastery. But you guys got there without having to go through something this that no, no, it's a different it's different. The the grief hurts in your heart so bad that if you just ignore it and you don't feel it, like it it forces you to feel it in your heart space energetically. Yeah, and it's like that raw, true emotion of this hurt so bad that it it open it opens. It's like the poison in the antidote, right?

Joya 19:18

Yeah, it doesn't open right away. So it in divine time? In divine time, yeah. What didn't you you don't say what you went through, but maybe like the cliff notes and how your high heart opened. May may I and what it feels like for you.

Late ADHD Diagnosis And Self Forgiveness

Nancy 19:34

Immediately when you said, what caused your high heart to open? What experience? And of course it is a number of experiences because it doesn't just crack open once. It is a, I feel like uh there's a merciful way, you know, uh a humble way that we go through the process. And it has to be easeful for our entire system and all our different bodies for us to integrate that energy. And our higher self wants us to express from this place because it really truly is the most easeful way to live. And especially the energy that we're experiencing, we're having now with us. It it started sparking in me. I wanted to know more about me. And that was that's what self-love is is self-acknowledging your truths, even if you don't like them. And that's you know, we can call them the shadows and whatever you want to call them within you, but the different aspects of s of ourselves that we can separate from and lock away. And I decide I'm not gonna do that anymore. I really want to be whole again.

Joya 20:43

Yeah.

Nancy 20:43

And then I I discovered through my experience with my son that I have ADHD and I don't want to label myself. And at the same time, I needed some kind of uh guidance in what I was experiencing in my life and and and then understanding some components of how much more difficult it is to diagnose women and women at a later later stage in life. I'm 62 and just discovering this when I was 61. I'd look back on my life and I saw all these points of these turning points that I I I thought I failed, but it was because of my brain. And I grieved my life.

Joya 21:33

Yeah.

Nancy 21:34

I went through months. Oh, it's still of oh, that's why I couldn't succeed at this. Oh, that's why I couldn't perform at this.

Joya 21:47

So you're having profound self forgiveness.

Amanda 21:49

Yes. And understanding the world is very hard on ADHD because it doesn't fit into the box. And it's not, it's some people call that like the neurodivergent. Right. I've worked with so many kids who haven't. I've just watched the self-esteem over the years just plummet because people are constantly like, do this, pay attention. Why didn't you complete that? Why aren't you organized? You know, all those like my mother said to me, how come you don't have any self-confidence? Yeah, right. When you're hearing that all the time. I'd love to know. Right. But there is a there is an absolute brilliance in what's defined as the ADHD brain that's very multidimensional.

Nancy 22:29

Yeah.

Amanda 22:29

Um, that has gifts beyond what our society understands.

Nancy 22:34

I slapped it on myself so that I can understand myself. And then I peeled it off and said I want to do it.

Group 22:42

It's like about the misused gift, right? It's like about understanding how to use the gift because your 3D doesn't get it. And if you're given a tool and you don't know how to use it, you're gonna use it wrong.

Nancy 22:52

And that's the exact reason why I stripped it off of myself, because then I started seeing the gifts that I have and I am giving away. But you're giving away.

Joya 23:06

Yeah.

Nancy 23:07

Because when I wasn't, I was in a hell of a lot of pain. A lot of emotional pain. Uh I didn't have strong relationships. I didn't trust myself, I would abandon myself, and you get tired of it. You get tired of being tired. And you also are curious when other people tell you how wonderful you are, how amazing you are, how gifted and talented you are, and inside, like um thanks, but no thanks. I don't believe it. Not all the way.

Amanda 23:45

And the more you start believing it in yourself, the more people reflect that beautifulness that is you and your high heart starts to open. And your high heart starts to open.

Nancy 23:56

And there, thank you very much, is a perfect example of offering your gift. And thank you. I receive it in my heart singing. And this is when I know. This is not when I know my heart my high heart is open. I just feel this easy love.

Amanda 24:20

And it goes back to that stuff you were drawing Chat GBT with me earlier, with the you felt like you had you're in places where you what was it you didn't feel you belonged and couldn't fully be yourself. Yes. Because those those societal systems marginalize groups of people, and they don't all fit in the box. And if you're not a specific way or a specific type or a specific lie, then you don't belong. And we're collectively healing that right now.

Joya 24:57

Oh, yeah.

Amanda 24:58

But we will belong for our most authentic gifts and selves.

Joya 25:01

Yeah.

Amanda 25:02

And there is no disability.

Joya 25:04

Exactly, because how there is no disability. There's no disability.

Breath, Meditation, And Group Resonance

Nancy 25:10

When when each of us is uniquely formed to fit the puzzle of this universe. So to try and become, you know, the cornerpiece when you're really in the middle of the puzzle, it's not gonna work. And so that's when we start really hitting those roadblocks in life and a lot of suffering starts to happen.

Amanda 25:32

I had this experience, it was almost the only way I can explain it is like, and not, and not it wasn't sexual in any way, but it was like an orgasm in the heart, like this um pulsation that exploded exploded like hardcasm, yeah. Exploded like a supernova. And then it like, you know what I mean? Like literally it opened, and people don't realize how energetically closed their hearts are, and it's so deeply connected to the breath, too. And the deeper we breathe, the more the heart can open. So mine really came with a very um dedicated meditation practice. I was doing energy practices every day for years, and it all just started happening. It just activates and it opens just by breathing through as deeply as if we're supposed to be breathing through. Um, and for me, the high heart, it's really funny, but I've heard a lot of people explain it differently, their experience with the high heart. My high heart feels like a little man is um in my heart and walking up the staircase up toward my throat. And then I have this like different feeling of energy above the heart. I love it. And all of a sudden I'll feel it come in and go, oh, here comes my high heart. I didn't realize this, but when I first started doing groups, um we I started becoming a vessel for the high heart activations. Yes. So what would happen is I would be in a group, like say there's like six or seven of us in a circle, and then all of a sudden my heart would come into that resonance. And then all of a sudden I would feel, I would start to feel the others' hearts come into resonance at the same time as me. Yes. And then they'd be like, whoa, what is that? What's happening? And then we're all in the high heart resonance together and all feeling that same energetic up in this thyomus area. And that high heart activation together as a group coming into that high heart resonance as one, it like shows us how we are truly in a unified field together. Yeah. And it's like that swimming dolphins energy and the starling energy and the magic that happens in the portal of that energy field. And that's what we've been in this weekend. It's our birth rate. Yeah. And we forgot how beautiful it can be with each other.

Joya 28:04

Well, thank you, ladies, for this combo. And I'm sure very helpful for people, I hope, to understand and feel the frequency of the of the lived embodied feminine energy and like what it really is.

Nancy 28:20

Yes.

Guided High Heart Embodiment Practice

More Meditations And Closing

Joya 28:21

It's love. It's love and it's not show. It's not show. It's love is easy. Oh, I enjoyed listening to that conversation again. And I hope that you got a lot out of it to feel and feel your high heart and to understand where it is and to tune into that space in your body and to feel how it lights you up. And with that, I'm going to guide you now through a practice for you to feel your high heart. So go ahead and pause this and go create a space where you can be left alone for just a few minutes to do this practice. As with all of my meditations, this is an embodiment meditation. Stand with your feet shoulder width apart and feel your feet held magnetically to the ground through the force of gravity. Feel if you can sense a little space between your foot and the earth as if you're hovering just a tiny bit. And now visualize roots going down through your feet, down into the center core of Mother Earth, and say, I connect myself to the healing center of Mother Earth, from whom all life grows. And take a deep breath, and as you inhale, feel the energy coming up through those roots and into your body. And now raise your hands over your head and open your fingers wide like a tree branch. And say, I connect myself to the healing light of the source. And as you inhale, pull your hands down slowly and visualize a tube of light surrounding you and going down into your body. And now say I connect myself to my deep self. And feel where in your body just lit up. And if you feel it in your high heart, put your hands over that place where you feel your deep self to be. And consciously breathe love into that space. And feel that love is a very real substance that participates with your being. Inhale love, exhale love. And for the rest of this meditation, simply breathe in love into that space within you. And you can open your eyes whenever you're ready and take that frequency with you into your day everywhere you go. And if you liked that meditation, I've created more of these now available on my website, turnupyourlight.com or joyasnowski.com, if you can spell my name. And they're just beautiful practices. I've decided to take the questions that I'm most asked and turn them into meditations. Each one has a talk in the beginning, a teaching about it, and then a 20 minute practice. I hope you enjoy those. Thank you for listening, and I wish you a beautiful week. See you soon. Bye.